Understanding Our Collective Exhaustion
Over the past several years, one consistent theme has emerged from my work with audiences: exhaustion. During a post-it note activity I’ve led since COVID, I ask participants to write down their resting emotional state, what that sounds like as a sentence, and what behaviors show up because of it. When we place them on the wall and read them aloud, a pattern appears—most people describe feeling tired, stressed, or fearful.
This isn’t limited to adults. Kids, parents, and teachers alike are worn out. Of course, sleep plays a huge role. Creating consistent sleep rhythms—going to bed and waking at the same time, building an evening ritual, and allowing rest on weekends—is vital. But even those who sleep well often still feel exhausted. Clearly, something deeper is going on.
The Overstimulation of Modern Life
We live in the most overstimulated era in history. The amount of content we consume before noon today exceeds what previous generations saw in an entire day—or even a week. Our brains weren’t designed to process this much data. Every day, we’re forced to make hundreds of micro-decisions, shift schedules, and adapt our attention constantly. That constant adjustment drains our mental energy.
The Hidden Weight of Social Media
One of the most significant contributors to our exhaustion is social media. When we scroll, we absorb an enormous amount of emotional and informational input—often unconsciously. We might come across a friend’s grief, someone else’s celebration, or distressing world news, and without realizing it, we carry those emotional weights.
The beauty of social media is its ability to connect us—it reminds us of birthdays, milestones, and moments we might otherwise miss. But it’s not other people’s responsibility to post less; it’s ours to regulate how much we take in. Between billboards, radio ads, and constant notifications, much of our intake isn’t even chosen. The one thing we can control is our scrolling.
Limiting screen time isn’t about rules or guilt—it’s about protecting your mental bandwidth. The older I get, the less I can handle emotionally or cognitively, and that’s okay. When I stay disciplined about my social media use, my mind feels clearer, calmer, and less burdened.
Escaping the Trap of the Algorithm
As an entrepreneur, I know how essential social media can be for business. Posting consistently, engaging followers, and staying visible can feel like a full-time job. But at some point, I had to ask: Who do I want to be?
At 51, I decided to focus deeply on becoming an expert in community building. I love entrepreneurship, but I no longer want to be enslaved to algorithms. When you rely on social media to sell, you serve the platform—not your purpose. Breaking that dependency has set me free.
If you must post for work, schedule your content. Plan emails and updates ahead of time so you can engage intentionally rather than reactively. I still use tools to automate posts for community events and projects, but I no longer live online. That boundary has brought peace—and freedom from chasing validation.
Redefining Success and Relationships
At one point, I had 18,000 followers on Instagram. Today, I have 12,000—and I couldn’t be happier. Losing followers used to sting, but now I realize: Who were those people, really? Trying to maintain emotional connection with thousands of strangers is exhausting.
Human beings are wired for depth, not scale. You can truly sustain about five close, reciprocal relationships—the number of fingers on one hand. When we spread ourselves too thin, we drain our capacity for real connection. Simplifying your social life is not about exclusion—it’s about honoring your limits.
Capacity, Constraints, and Schedule
Many of us aren’t just tired—we’re overextended. We say yes to everything, run from one commitment to the next, and never pause to assess our limits. Two powerful questions can change everything:
What is my capacity? What are my constraints?
Capacity is what you can sustain without burnout—the rhythm that feels healthy. Constraints are the realities that shape your life: your children, your job, your commitments. You can’t eliminate these, but you can learn to work within them.
When we ignore capacity and constraints, we swing between extremes—pouring ourselves out for others until we collapse, then retreating completely to “take care of ourselves.” True balance isn’t either/or; it’s both/and. Bravely Connected means staying connected to yourself and others—honoring both your needs and your relationships.
Helping the Next Generation Navigate Exhaustion
Kids today face the same pressures, amplified. Their brains are constantly bombarded with information and social comparisons. It’s not enough to simply turn off screens; we must coach them through it—help them reflect on what they’re taking in, how many friendships they’re managing, and where they’re finding their worth.
Having one or two real friends is enough. They don’t need hundreds of followers or YouTube fame to matter. We must help them build internal boundaries and emotional resilience in a world that constantly demands their attention.
Final Thoughts: Simplify to Restore
Exhaustion isn’t just about lack of sleep—it’s the cost of overstimulation, overcommitment, and overconnection.
To restore your energy:
- Limit the information you consume.
- Evaluate your true capacity.
- Focus on a few deep relationships.
- Work within your constraints.
- Reclaim your time from algorithms and noise.
Freedom and peace come when we simplify our lives and choose presence over performance. It’s not easy, but it’s brave—and it’s the only way to truly rest.
Bravely Connected 
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