We talk a lot about community—how to build it, how to strengthen it, how to restore it when it’s been damaged. But “community” can feel like a vague, idealistic idea unless we break it down into something practical and human. Whether your community is your family, your workplace, your neighborhood, or a group recovering after disaster, the principles of building connection are surprisingly the same.
Recently, I led a webinar for practitioners on community creation, and it reminded me that although theories and frameworks are helpful, it’s the simple, human-level practices that actually transform environments. Today I want to share those with you—practices that anyone, anywhere, can start using right now.
1. Put Your Ear to the Ground
In a world full of academic models, expert opinions, and strategic plans, the most powerful tool we have for creating community is old-fashioned listening.
Not listening to respond.
Not listening to prove a theory.
Not listening to offer a quick fix.
Just… listening.
In disaster recovery work, one of our specialists once told me, “You listen to us. No one has done that in a long time.” It struck me deeply. How else can we possibly know what works, what doesn’t, or what people need unless we are willing to hear from those who are actually living the experience?
This applies everywhere—parenting, teaching, leading, community organizing. People rarely express their truest needs directly. We need to pay attention to:
- Behaviors
- Patterns
- Body language
- Silence
- What isn’t being said
Surveys and forums have their place, but they can never replace human attunement. When we really listen, we begin to hear the story underneath the story.
2. Go Seven Layers Deep
Once we’ve put our ear to the ground, the next step is curiosity.
So often we accept surface-level issues as the whole story. For example:
“Our community lives in poverty.”
But what’s under that?
Income levels? Employment opportunities? Disability funding cuts? Mental health challenges?
Or take a personal example:
“My child never listens.”
Why?
What’s underneath that?
What’s underneath that?
Asking “why” seven times—seven layers deep—moves us from vague frustrations to real understanding.
And vague problems can’t be solved.
But specific ones can.
Try writing out your barriers with uncomfortable specificity. When you name the exact struggle, you open the door to the exact solution.
3. Imagine a Preferred Future
Once you know what’s really going on beneath the surface, the next step is to ask:
“If I could wave a magic wand, what would I want this to look like?”
Most people find this surprisingly difficult. We’re good at identifying problems. We’re not as practiced at imagining possibilities.
In my own community work, our preferred future is vivid:
- Thriving small businesses
- Improved quality of life for those with disabilities
- A neighborhood where people walk, greet each other, and feel safe
- Shared meals, art, music
- Hospitality and welcome
- Community gardens and gathering spaces
- A sense of ownership and camaraderie
When you can imagine what could be, even faintly, you can start to see the pathway forward.
This isn’t positive thinking. It’s reimagining. It’s leadership.
When my son struggled with his mental health for nearly a decade, the single thing that kept me going was my imagination of who he could become. That vision helped me push through the seasons where it seemed like nothing was changing.
Communities are no different.
4. Focus on What You Can Control
As you list your barriers, notice which ones:
- You can influence
- You can’t influence
- You can influence a little
We often get stuck trying to fix things far outside our control. But when you focus on the areas where you have agency—even very small ones—the path forward becomes clear.
Big change happens through micro-movements, not heroic leaps.
One bite at a time.
5. Activate the People You Already Have
Here is the piece we overlook most:
Everything we need is usually already sitting in the room.
People are the solution to every social issue—not the abstract idea of community, but actual human beings with gifts, skills, and passions.
In my own neighborhood, over the past year and a half, people have stepped forward with what they love:
- A local artist started a free art class
- A woman began a gentle Pilates class for people with mobility challenges
- A young couple created a youth soapbox derby
- A car enthusiast formed a committee to start a car show for men who rarely feel included
On the surface, these might seem unrelated to community issues. But in our neighborhood, the biggest struggle is disconnection. And each of these initiatives bridges isolation, builds confidence, and creates belonging.
Sometimes the most powerful movements come from places no one expects—from groups of “underdogs” who have been overlooked, underestimated, or dismissed. They rise because someone invites them into possibility.
6. Your Role Is to Activate, Not to Fix
If you’re a parent, a teacher, a leader, or a community advocate, your role isn’t to have all the answers. It’s not to hire all the experts. It’s not to build the perfect program.
Your role is to:
- Listen deeply
- Identify barriers
- Imagine what could be
- Take baby steps
- Activate the gifts of the people already present
When these pieces come together, workplaces thrive. Classrooms thrive. Families thrive. Neighborhoods thrive.
Thriving isn’t built by experts—it’s built by everyday people who are invited to bring their piece of the puzzle.
And you can start building that today.
Bravely Connected 
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