I ask people about their dreams a lot.

And do you know one of the most common answers I hear?

“I don’t know.”

Sometimes it’s followed by:

“I don’t think I have one.”

I think there can be a little bit of shame attached to admitting that. We live in a world that tells us to find our passion, discover our purpose, dream big, set goals and build the life we want. Meanwhile, a whole lot of people are quietly thinking:

I have absolutely no idea what I want.

If that’s you, I want to start here: You don’t need to know your dream to start dreaming.

Maybe your job right now isn’t to find the answer. Maybe it’s simply to start noticing the clues.

First, What Do I Mean by “Dream”?

I think we sometimes confuse dreams with goals.

A goal is something you want to accomplish.

An idea is something you could do.

But a dream goes deeper.

Here’s how I think about it:

A dream is an inner desire for something you want to bring alive—in yourself, your life, or the world around you.

That distinction matters because you might not know the form of your dream yet.

You might not know what career you want, but you know:

I want my life to help people.

You might not know exactly what you want to build, but you know:

I want to bring people together.

Maybe you want freedom.

Adventure.

Beauty.

Connection.

Creativity.

Impact.

Belonging.

Justice.

Contribution.

Those deeper desires are worth paying attention to.

Sometimes the expression of our dream changes many times throughout our lives while the desire underneath it remains surprisingly consistent.

So maybe instead of asking:

“What is my dream?”

start with:

“What is the deeper desire inside of me?”

Maybe Nobody Ever Told You Dreaming Was an Option

I think we need to talk about this too. Some people haven’t lost their dream. They were never given permission to have one. Life has mostly been about doing what needed to be done.

Finish school.

Get a job.

Pay the bills.

Raise the kids.

Take care of people.

Get through the difficult season.

Be responsible.

Survive.

And somewhere along the way, nobody stopped to ask:

What do YOU want?

What makes you come alive?

What are you curious about?

What would you love to learn?

What would you love to contribute?

What might be inside of you that the world hasn’t seen yet?

If you don’t know the answers, that doesn’t mean there isn’t anything inside of you. Maybe you’ve simply never been given the space to ask the questions. And sometimes life itself takes away our capacity to dream.

Grief can do that.

Disappointment can do that.

Burnout can do that.

Financial stress can do that.

Years of caring for everyone else can do that.

Sometimes “I don’t have a dream” actually means: “I don’t have the capacity to imagine something different right now.” If that’s you, you probably don’t need someone yelling at you to DREAM BIGGER.

You might need rest.

Connection.

Fun.

Safety.

Curiosity.

Permission to want something again. So don’t force yourself to produce a dream. Start collecting clues. Here are three places to look.

1. LOOK BACK

Where have you already come alive?

Your story contains clues. Think about your life. When have you felt most like yourself? Not necessarily when you were most successful. Not when you earned the most money. Not when someone applauded. When did you feel alive?

What have people consistently asked you for help with?

What comes so naturally to you that you’ve assumed everyone can do it?

What have you done and thought:

“This feels like me.”

And here’s another question:

What have you been through?

I don’t believe every painful experience needs to become a purpose. We don’t owe the world something inspirational because something difficult happened to us, but sometimes our experiences reveal what we deeply care about.

• The person who knows what exclusion feels like may become someone who creates belonging.
• Someone who struggled in school may develop incredible compassion for kids who learn differently.
• Someone who experienced loneliness may become a natural connector.
• Someone who desperately needed one person to believe in them may become the person who believes in others.

Ask:

What has my story awakened in me? Look back. There may be clues there.

2. LOOK WITHIN

What keeps stirring in you?

Now pay attention to what moves you.

What do you care deeply about?

What makes you angry because you think:

“This shouldn’t be this way.”

What breaks your heart?

What can you talk about for an hour without preparing?

What are you constantly reading or watching?

Who do you admire?

And here’s a slightly uncomfortable one:

3. LOOK AROUND

Stop looking for clarity and start experimenting.

This may be the most important one. If you genuinely have no idea what your dream is, stop trying so hard to figure it out.

Go live.

Try things.

Take a class.

Volunteer somewhere.

Make something.

Talk to someone whose life interests you.

Go somewhere you’ve never been.

Help somebody.

Join something.

Explore.

And don’t make everything productive! You are allowed to try pottery without opening an Etsy store. You can take photographs without becoming a photographer. You can volunteer somewhere and discover that you absolutely hate it. That’s a clue too! Nope. Not that. Clue. Try something else. Hmm. That was interesting. Clue. Then: I really want to do that again. Big clue. We often think clarity needs to come before movement. I think it’s frequently the opposite.

Movement creates discovery.

Sometimes you don’t think your way into purpose. You bump into it.

Why This Matters Beyond You

Here’s where dreaming becomes much bigger to me than personal development. Because what happens when someone discovers something they are good at, something they care about, and something they want to contribute?

They start showing up differently.

They create.

They help.

They volunteer.

They start something.

They solve a problem.

They mentor someone.

They connect people.

They make something beautiful.

They notice a need and think:

Maybe I could do something about that. That’s why I believe helping people discover their dreams can actually be a form of community development. Because a community isn’t only made stronger by the resources we bring into it, it’s made stronger when we release the potential that is already there.

What If We Asked Different Questions About Our Communities?

We often enter communities asking:

What are the problems?

What’s missing?

Who needs help?

What services do we need?

Those are important questions.

But what if we also asked:

Who’s already here?

Who is the amazing cook?

Who’s great with kids?

Who can fix anything?

Who is an artist?

Who’s a natural connector?

Who knows everybody on the block?

Who has lived experience that could help someone else?

Who has a business idea?

Who has always wanted to start something?

Who’s already leading but nobody has ever called them a leader?

What is sitting inside the people who already live here that has never been invited out?

Because potential doesn’t automatically become contribution. Sometimes someone needs to notice it. Someone needs to ask. Someone needs to create an opportunity. Someone needs to say: “Have you ever thought about doing something with that?”, and then something changes.

A resident becomes a participant.

A participant becomes a contributor.

A contributor becomes a leader.

And now we aren’t simply building programs for people.

We’re building community with them.

Dreaming Creates Contributors

This is ultimately why I’m so passionate about dreaming. Not because I want everyone to quit their jobs and become entrepreneurs. In fact:

Your dream doesn’t have to become your job.

Your dream might be to foster children.

Grow an incredible garden.

Become the house where everyone gathers.

Write.

Make music.

Mentor teenagers.

Restore furniture.

Travel.

Build a healthier family.

Create art.

Coach.

Make your neighbourhood less lonely.

A meaningful dream doesn’t have to make money.

It needs to make something come alive. Something in you. Something in another person. Something in your community, because I don’t just want communities filled with people chasing individual success. I want communities filled with people who know what they carry and know they have something to contribute.

To me, that’s an important part of belonging. Belonging isn’t only: “There is a place here for me.” Deep belonging eventually becomes: “There is something here for me to give.”

You Don’t Need the Whole Dream

So if you’ve been saying: “I don’t have a dream,” I’d love for you to change one word. Try: “I don’t know my dream yet.” and then don’t go searching for a five-year plan.

Go looking for clues.

LOOK BACK.
Where have I already come alive?

LOOK WITHIN.
What keeps stirring in me?

LOOK AROUND.
What’s something I could try?

Follow one clue. See where it leads. Then follow another. Because you don’t need to know the whole dream. You only need to notice the next clue. And perhaps one day you’ll look back at all those seemingly disconnected clues and realize:

There I am.

There’s something I care about.

There’s something I’m good at.

There’s something I want to give.

There’s something inside of me that wants to exist outside of me.

And maybe that’s where a dream begins.

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Want Some Help Finding Your Clues?

This is exactly why we created Dream Academy.

You don’t need to arrive with a business idea. You don’t need a perfectly defined dream. You don’t even need to know what you want yet.

We start by helping you explore your story, strengths, energy, heart and curiosity—and begin noticing the clues that might point toward something you want to bring alive.

Dream Academy begins September 17.

Maybe your first step isn’t figuring out your dream.

Maybe it’s simply giving yourself permission to explore what’s possible.